I was thinking today about the possibility of me going back in time, to around 1860. I'd go somewhere in the now industrialising Europe, with all that hanging about in muddy streets and chimneys and asking for seconds and all that other depressing shit.
Anyway, my idea was that I'm only going back in time to bring someone back with me. Like maybe someone not too educated, not a physician. Maybe something like a chimney sweep or rag-a-bone man. So he'd be pretty young, and doesn't really have the mental capacity to envision a future world different to his own.
So then we get back from time travelling and it's only been like 5 seconds, and then straight away BAM all that technology everywhere up in his face. His cognitive abilities are totally screwed as they try to comprehend all the neon plastic lights and manufactured crap everywhere. And ohh yeah, I'm turning on the stereo and the TV and the Christmas lights, waving barbie dolls and iPhones in his stupefied face. Pretty soon the synapses in his brain have cut ties with their associates in a desperate bid for self preservation. It's too late though and he's curled on the floor crying silently and I think he soiled himself too.
After all this I'm like, just kidding man! I'm sorry, it's the future! not dark magic or anything. You'll be right, and I buy him a beer, and we sit at a table and eat nuts for while. He seems sullen though and doesn't want to talk much. So I end up taking his ungrateful ass back to his industrial revolution life in the old mother country and go back to my life as per normal. When I get back I see he dropped some diary book or something, a small tattered thing. I open it up and it's got his address and name... J. Stalin.
In summary, I'd like to say that time travel is not like those movies where the plummy young prince travels to modern day New York and somehow learns to catch taxis and use elevators within minutes and not only doesn't suffer a complete breakdown, but manages to court a fair lady. Oh look a giant machine in the sky! None of it bothers him. Ah, what a larf.
Consensus: Time travel is not a toy and is a proven killer.
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